Ocarina of Time

You, the reader, might take a look at this post title and be saying to yourself, “Why Chip and Laura, what on earth does the Nintendo 64 classic Ocarina of Time have anything to do with horror?”  You might also ask yourself why you are talking to a computer screen instead of posting witty comments on our page, you raving lunatic.  But I digress.

Within this certain Legend lies two of the more terrifying enemies from any video game featuring a certain princess named Zelda.  I am (of course) speaking of the ReDeads and the Dead Hand.

Poe Collector

Once Link acquires the Master Sword, and somehow sleeps off a seven year hangover(during which time Ganon takes over Hyrule), he returns to a home which has changed drastically.  Where there was once a kindly old guard who watched over a room full of clay pots for no reason, now there is a creepy hooded merchant who buys ghosts from you (and implies that he would be a male prostitute if he had looks like yours *shudder*).


The citizens of Hyrule Castle have also undergone a change for the worse over the course of seven years.  The happy, adventurer aiding denziens of Hyrule have been replaced with the horrible ReDeads: wood-masked zombies whose very stare can freeze Link in his tracks.  The ReDeads will stumble towards our hero, throwing their cursed gaze his way, and shrieking with the cries of the damned.  And then, once they are close enough, they grab Link and… hump his face to death.  I don’t know why they do it, but for some reason, these monsters just jump our hero’s bones and go to town on his face.  Which, when you think about it, is even more terrifying than the usual zombie issues of eating brains and other available body parts.

But deep within the recesses of the Haunted Well of Kakariko Village, there lies a much more sinister evil.  The Dead Hand mid-boss stands between our hero and his quest.  Well, I guess he sort of shambles, but you get the idea.  This horror is made up of several tentacled hands rising up from the moist earth, and an abomination of bloodied flesh which will consume Link the moment he draws near.

See?  Pretty damn scary.  And you thought Zelda was just bulldog-faced guards and octopi who shoot rocks out of their noses.

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One thought on “Ocarina of Time

  1. […] to last year’s post on Ocarina of Time, you may be asking yourself, “What does Metal Gear Solid 3 have to do with horror?”  […]

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